Sri Lanka: Request from HRW
Posted on January 28th, 2010

Asoka Weerasinghe Kings Grove Crescent. Gloucester . Ontario . K1J 6G1 . Canada

January 28, 2010

Mr. Ban Ki-moon
Secretary of the United  Nations
United Nations Headquarters  
New York, US.

ATTENTION: Human Rights Watch


I have made two observations this morning; one is that you expressed relief on the relatively peaceful conclusion to Sri Lanka’s first post-war national election. 

 I am glad you did as Sri Lanka is generally a very peaceful nation, and I am sure you have noted by now.  Sri Lankans are a group of people who refuses even slap a mosquito to death when this pesky fly keeps sucking blood off the person as well as injecting poison into the body.

The second observation was that Human Rights Watch (HRW) has requested you to seek accountability from the re-elected President Mahinda Rajapaksa on human rights violations by Sri Lanka during the latter stages of the Tamil Tiger War.  You have gone through this nonsense umpteen number of times before haven’t you?

Here’s my advice to you Sir.  These HRW personnel obviously need help to relieve their mental constipation on Sri Lanka.  Prescribe them a Sri Lankan laxative which might relieve them of this troubling affliction.

Ask them to request their Sri Lankan partner Sunila Abesekera to provide them with the root of a much branched legume tree, Senna auriculata, commonly known in Sri Lanka as ranawara.   To boil it and drink the water that would certainly help them to gush out their precarious Sri Lanka afflicting constipation.

And also ask them not to indulge too much on foods that would “stop them up” for breakfast as an excessive intake of cheeses, especially gorgonzola, and not to drink too much of milk as it produces too much of mucous which solidifies inside the body.

Tell the HRW women folk that ranawara not only cleans mental constipation but also will clear their complexion as it contains Auksemeethial Anthorokvinon and rich in Tannin.

This prescription will certainly help you not to be bothered by these Human Rights types as well as help Sri Lanka’s new progressive administration not to dissipate their valuable time to deal with these characters and devote their time to provide stability, reconciliation and reach greater heights after the 27 years of haemorrhaging of that sovereign island democratic nation by that bunch of ruthless Tamil Tiger terrorists, who also happens to be friends of HRW.


Asoka Weerasinghe

cc.HRW, New York

P.Kohona, Sri Lanka’s Permanent Representative at the UN

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